In the spirit of the Xmas season, it is impossible to escape the topic of The Gifts, The Presents, The Giving… Of Stuff. So much Stuff. This year I am narrowing it down to children’s toys, as just one example of this, well…. insanity would not be too strong a word.

I was talking to a friend of mine yesterday who told me how impressed he was (not in a good way as it turned out) by his friend’s basement. Or shall we call it their “Private Toy Land”. Of course, he was talking about a space in someone’s house entirely devoted to Toys. Toys and then more Toys. An enormous amount of them. Too many toys, dare we say… In the present example the family only had one child. With the current state of affairs in the world, there are probably not many people who have not seen this type of room at one place or another. My instantaneous comment was, without a doubt in my mind , “I don’t agree with it”. My good friend was on the same side. And I think the reasons why we very strongly disagree with it are worth mentioning, even if it would be just to spur some attention to the subject, and ask ourselves some good questions.

1. How many toys does your child really need? I will only say that with most toys, our son usually plays once or twice, and after that they just sit there and take away precious space in our small flat.

2. Is the abundant monstrosity of stuffed modern day playrooms teaching your child something that is of any positive value? It is difficult to ignore the strong suspicion that whatever this may be teaching, it would be decidedly outside of the realm of the good old sharing, not to mention generosity…

3. Am I a lonely loner thinking “Does anyone have any idea how many villages of starving children can be fed if the money used to buy toys destined to sit in boxes and on shelves was donated to such or similar worthwhile cause instead?” It is a disturbing thought. I would put this one at the top of the list, but sometimes it can be hard to get the parents’ attention unless the focus in on their own child. No apologies for this statement, we all know it is true.

I can certainly go on with the questions, but to keep this short and sweet, I will end with how we, my husband and I, are trying to cope with the hard to escape consumerism that is constantly creeping around our 3-year old, and I will stay mostly narrowed on the Toys instance of the issue for the same reason.

We try to let people know that we do not need any more toys, “We have very limited space, nothing large, please.” We keep a good portion of the toys away so that only a controllable amount is at everyday’s reach. We give away, distribute to grandparents places etc. We stack away a good portion of the newly gifted toys (still unopened) after every event that results in gift accumulation to gradually reveal them overtime hoping this would result in better appreciation and less harmful abundance effect. We try to educate our son about this at every opportunity, and we are very pleased that he never cries for stuff nor is inclined to want to take stuff when we leave places loaded with items generally very tempting to children.

We do all of this, but it is not easy. Another Xmas is just around the corner, and we certainly do not want to insult any grandparents. Including those who have a set budget to spend (meaning not an amount not to go over, but an amount that HAS to BE spent on each grandchild….) World causes are not exactly a thing of our parents’ generation, we have found. If anyone has had any success convincing the grandparents of their children that donating to PETA is a rather meaningful alternative to gifting a yet another outfit that their grandchild simply does not need, without thus initiating the Great Family Scandal, please do give us some tips!

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